Benign: What you be after you be eight Bacteria: Back door to the cafeteria. Barium: What doctors do when patients die. Cesarean Section: A neighborhood in Rome. Catscan: Searching for kitty. Cauterize: Made eye contact with her. Colic: A sheep dog. Coma: A punctuation mark. D & C: Where Washington is. Dilate: To live long. Enema: Not a friend. Fester: Quicker than someone else. Fibula: A small lie. G.I. Series: World Series of military baseball. Hang nail: What you hang your coat on. Impotent: Distinguished, well known. Labor Pain: Getting hurt at work. Medical Staff: A Doctor's cane. Morbid: A higher offer than I bid. Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates. Node: I knew it! Out patient: A person who has fainted. Pap Smear: A father hood test. Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis. Post Operative: A letter carrier. Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery. Rectum: Darn near killed him. Secretion: Hiding something. Seizure: Roman emperor. Tablet: A small table. Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport. Tumor: More than one. Urine: Opposite of mine. Varicose: Near by/close by.
My apologies for taking 'literary license' with a few of the words in this list. Many of them are pronounced incorrectly intentionally.
